A Real-World Review From a Former Adult Star
🎬 Intro: Some Sex Positions Are Just for Show
In adult films, we do all kinds of acrobatic sex positions that look wild on camera—but in real life? They often make no sense. Today, I’m ranking some of the most impractical sex positions you’ve likely seen in porn, using three real-world criteria:
📊 Rating Criteria:
- Her Pleasure – How good it actually feels for her.
- Your Pleasure – How enjoyable it is for the guy.
Comfort & Effort – How physically demanding or awkward it is to pull off.
🦵 1. Standing Leg-Up Doggy Style
This position is designed entirely for the camera. Bending her over and cranking one leg up looks visually interesting—but it’s not comfortable or especially pleasurable for either person.
- Her Pleasure: 4/10
- Your Pleasure: 4/10
Comfort & Effort: 3/10
➤ Total: 11/30 – 🫤 Sad Face Category
🛏️ 2. The T-Bone
Imagine this: she’s lying on her back, you’re at a right angle on your side—your bodies form a “T”. It’s unique and offers a different penetration angle but isn’t particularly intense for either partner.
- Her Pleasure: 4/10
- Your Pleasure: 4/10
Comfort & Effort: 9/10
➤ Total: 17/30 – 😐 Averagely Average
🍑 3. Reverse Spoon (aka the Underrated Hero)
This one? Absolute favorite. She’s on her side with one leg extended, the other bent. You straddle that extended leg and enter from above. It’s visually hot, deeply pleasurable, and way easier to maintain than it looks.
- Her Pleasure: 8/10
- Your Pleasure: 8/10
Comfort & Effort: 8/10
➤ Total: 24/30 +1 for Uniqueness – 🔥 TurboGasm Territory
💀 4. The Piledriver
The most ridiculous one of them all. She’s basically folded in half with her shoulders on the bed and legs above her head while you thrust downward. Difficult to perform, painful for most, and looks better than it feels (for everyone).
- Her Pleasure: 1/10
- Your Pleasure: 1/10
Comfort & Effort: 1/10
➤ Total: 3/30 – 💩 Doodoo Category
📝 Final Thoughts
Porn positions might look spicy on screen, but many of them are impractical, uncomfortable, and overhyped. If you’re looking for maximum pleasure and minimum injury risk, skip the showy stuff and go for angles that actually work in real life.
Want more position breakdowns? 👉 Check out Part 2 of this ranking series and discover which Kama Sutra poses are worth your time (and which ones belong in the blooper reel).
